Holy Crap! We have a lot of crap.

There's nothing like a move to drag your guise of simplification into the harsh light of day.

After nearly 2 years in Raleigh, Les and I moved back to Illinois last week. It was a bittersweet departure. We made so many incredible friends, and we fell in love with Raleigh in just 18 months. We will miss the Southland and all of our friends (especially in the winter), but we're excited for Les to start his new job as a full time professor.

We were sad to leave, but do you know what really sucks about moving? MOVING.

MOVING SUCKS.

Packing up all of our earthly belongings really made me stressed out about the number of our possessions and the lengths we are willing to go to move them from place to place.

Not only did we pay to acquire them in the first place, but we then have to pay to transport them from home to home. And let me tell you, moving ain't cheap! We very seriously discussed the idea of chucking almost everything (via donation), saving the couple of thousand dollars in moving expenses, and starting over with a clean slate and a commitment to only allow truly useful and beautiful things into our new home.

But we didn't do that. It seemed wasteful/impractical and ultimately pretty expensive. Won't we need socks and bottle openers and bowls in our new home? Didn't people we love just buy us most of the contents of this kitchen for our wedding? Didn't we carefully select this stuff when we bought it? (Most of it, anyway?)

So we didn't go with the Chuck it and Start Fresh plan, but I was still determined to pare down my stuff. I signed up for the Becoming Minimalist blog and started pinning tips on de-cluttering and purging. And to really seal the deal, I convinced Les that we would only take as much as could fit into 2 U-Boxes and our car trunks. That's actually not a lot of space for a 2 bedroom apartment that is insulated primarily by hardcover philosophy tomes.

We did manage to donate or discard a lot of things. I completed a massive Dresser Drawer Purge that was incredibly gratifying. Look at how easily these drawers close now! Look how neatly the remaining t-shirts are stacked!

Stuff I Did Not Move

So I got rid of an embarrassing mound of stretched out coffee-stained t-shirts. A good start, but more like a ding than a substantial dent in the Crap.

As the packing extravaganza finally wore down, we started cramming things randomly into boxes. Les and I started saying things like "If it makes it to Illinois in one piece, then great, and if not, then who cares...". If we don't care whether that particular photo frame or pie plate survives, then why oh why do we own it? And why are we moving it? We're strange, stuff-owning creatures, though. I do hope that those things all survive their long journey back to us. But ultimately they are just things, and I will (try) not (to) cry over their untimely demise if the time comes.

Now that we're here and our U-boxes are on the way, I do wish we had purged some more. I'm thinking I will keep thinning and thinning my clothing stash as we set up home in a new place with limited storage. My plan is to immediately dismiss anything we do not actually need or use or love in our new home. Give each item some sort of probation status for each season and then coldly kick it to the curb if it is not pulling its Beauty or Usefulness weight. If we had had time to do that before we packed two moving crates Tetris-style, that would have been even better. Now, we get to deal with the unpacking and post-move purging on the Illinois side.

But I do love a challenge! New home, new space, new opportunities for conscientious consumption and thoughtful simplificiation.

Oh, and since I am currently unemployed, more blogging. And hopefully a photography class to improve everyone's blog-reading experience.

Stress'll Do That To Ya

So we finally moved into our new apartment on Monday. Hooray! Les has been working diligently during the day on the sea of boxes, and I stay up late every night after work to keep unpacking and unpacking and unpacking and....

Whoa. I thought we had a lot of stuff when we PACKED. Unpacking has made this overabundance of stuff even more painfully painful.

And you know how I've been handling this 2 moves in 3 months + new job + new city + health issues + missing my friends?

I've been eating like crap, biting my nails, going to Target twice a week and coming home with MORE STUFF (seriously, What?), and reverting seamlessly back into soda drinking, paper-towel-using, disposable junk buying freakishness.

It's like all of my filters are cluttered with crud, and I can't quite think straight. I contemplate whether or not to run to Starbucks for a latte, even though I've already been twice this week and I don't really need any coffee. And I don't have a lot of extra cash to be throwing around. And I say to myself "yes. I need a latte" and I go. IN MY CAR! Because you have to drive everywhere here.

The only thing keeping me from teetering on the verge of a self-loathing melt down is to remember that I'm legitimately stressed out. And that self-soothing strategies kick in when we're wigging.

I remind myself that I have grand Green plans for this new place. That Les and I have already discussed action steps to use as little water as possible (you have to pay for water here! and it's expensive!), plant an organic garden, and purge purge purge anything that does not pass the "Useful/Lovely" test (see below).

There was one big box looming on the floor last night, and neither of us could remember what was inside. It was marked "HEAVY/FRAGILE". I finally grabbed the scissors and tore into it, scooping out the packing shreds and wrapping and taped protections. Several pieces didn't need to be unwrapped, because they were in bits at the bottom of the box. Completely destroyed. Two of those smashed things were actually quite dear to me. One was a very delicate antique china tea cup with tiny roses sprinkled around it's thin body. It had been in my mom's cabinet, all alone and without a set or saucer. I loved it. It had been wrapped fastidiously, but set too close to bigger, heavier things. It was smashed to smithereens, mom would say. The other obliterated item that nearly brought me to tears has also been very carefully wrapped and set inside a box and wrapped and set inside another box. I don't understand how this one smashed, but there it was, in splinters in its container. My brother in law had made me this ridiculously awesome octopus sculpture that he somehow fashioned with its tentacles wrapped realistically around a spherical glass candle holder. Honestly, it was one of the coolest things anyone has ever given me. And I loved it. It was going to be the centerpiece of our new bathroom's decor. And all that is left of it now is a pile of broken octopus arms and shards of glass.

Several candle glasses, jars, and flower pots were also reduced to rubble in the move. I had to keep reminding myself that it is just stuff. Just stuff. It is not my treasure, or my comfort.

But that mantra combined with my already anxious state made me inclined to roll our garbage dumpster up to the back door and just start throwing EVERYTHING out. To hold each and every item as it came out of the box and give it this test:

1. Is it beautiful?
2. Is it useful?
3. Would I miss it within 1 year?

I might actually do this. Room by room. I'll let you know. We have a boat-load of stuff that I do not think could possibly pass. My heart twisted up in sadness when I saw those things had been ruined. But honestly, I didn't lose any sleep. I bet dozens of other things (hundreds?) could meet the same fate without any lasting impact on my life. There are only a few things that I would truly grieve. Maybe that will be my next post. I'll make my "What would you grab if your house was on fire" list. Could help force this purge plan into focus, yes?

Why didn't we do this purge before we spent almost $3K to move a big truck full of stuff across the country?

Lessons learned.

I am Thankful for Old Friends. And Pancakes.

Two of my longest and dearest friendships in Chicago actually date all the way way back to my college days. I met Jeana and Jenny in Allen Hall freshman year of college (that was 15 years ago! Yikes!) and have been blessed by their friendship through years and years of highs and lows and loves and losses and concerts and movies and parties and races and pool dates and vacations and staycations and late nights and Magnums and.... BRUNCHES.

We have made an art form of eating brunch. We've gone all around the city sampling breakfast burritos, eggs Benedict, croissant sandwiches, omelettes, and of course pancakes. And it is THIS stack of ridiculous sweet divinity that has kept us coming back to Bongo Room low these many years:

Notice that we each have our own savory entree. Oh yes, the pancakes are our dessert. Our brunch dessert.

God Bless dear friends who not only don't judge your gluttony, but happily partake with gleeful smiles.

We had to go back to Bongo Room one more time before Les and I leave for Raleigh, and so today marked the start of our Eat Our Way Out of Chicago mission.

I am thankful for you, J&J and thankful that our friendship will go the distance. And now I'm going to serenade you with the Elephant Love Medley....

Thank God for inside jokes. And traditions. And happy farewells to local faves.

Til Next Time.

Giving Thanks for Change

I'm actually not a big fan of change. I usually endure it rather than embrace it, and sometimes that enduring is pretty ungraceful. But today I'm giving thanks for some Big Changes in my life.

I was offered and accepted a new job with Habitat for Humanity of Wake County in Raleigh, NC. I'm thankful for this unexpected opportunity to dive back into an organization I love and respect. I'm thankful that Les is excited, that we have a couple of friends out there already, and I'm thankful for the chance to start fresh in a new adventure. I'm thankful that the conversation of giving my resignation to my boss went smoothly, and that our interactions since then have been positive. I'm thankful that I am 85% excited and only 15% weepy (today).

Then there are all the nostalgic gratitudes I could start listing: I'm thankful for 10 and a half years in a ridiculously beautiful city. I'm thankful for the friends that have become my family, and for living within a couple of miles of my actual relatives for all these ups and downs of years. I'm thankful for Lake Michigan. And green space, and the most dazzling skyline I've ever seen (seriously, if you haven't driven south on Lake Shore Drive at sunrise, you simply MUST. DO. IT. Who knew that skyscrapers can turn so blazing pink?). And I'm thankful for all the ways that God has shaped and stretched and nurtured and prepared me (us) to take this leap away from the known and comfortable and into a new chapter. I feel like I need training wheels. But actually, I know that what I really needed was a good shove.

So that's the news around these parts! Thankfulness Thankfulness. Deep breaths, prayer, and faith. Good stuff.